Part Two: No Sloppy Wet Kisses

There are three moments where I can pinpoint when the Holy Spirit had spoken so loudly to me it was nearly audible. Two of those times involved "kisses." The most recent one happened about two-ish weeks ago while reading Beautiful Outlaw. It was late, everyone was asleep, and my nose was jammed in that book. I don't remember the exact page I was on, but something I read clicked, and this melody began playing inside my head:

"And heaven meets earth like a sloppy wet kiss..."

If you know me well, then you know that I'm terrible at remembering lyrics. I am not one to walk around humming or singing. I don't even play the radio very often. I play it in the car but that's about it. Don't get me wrong, I love music. In fact, if I had to pick Sunday sermons over Sunday music, I'd choose the music. Not because the sermons are bad, quite the contrary, I just love, love, love the worship time. To have a song randomly pop into my head is rare. Remembering lyrics is even less likely. While I don't recall what page I was on in that book, I do remember double checking to see if there was anything in the context that would've brought that song to memory. Nope. Nothing.

Except the Holy Spirit.

I knew he was singing it to me. I jumped up and ran for my phone and ear buds. I pulled up YouTube and searched for that song. I listened. Just when that beautiful line was about to fill my ears, I heard this instead:

"And heaven meets earth like an unforeseen kiss..."

Wait. What?

Rewind. Yep, they took it out! Where was my sloppy wet kiss? My heart sank. Why in the world did they replace the lyrics? I searched and searched, until I finally found this. I listened to it four times and wept, grinned, and raised my hands. I looked around to see if anyone had woken up and observed this completely insane momma's antics. I put the song in my "favorites" list. It was surreal. It still is.

Of course, my curious side took over. Why wasn't sloppy wet kiss in David Crowder's version? I knew I'd head it before. After a bit more searching, I stumbled across this. If you don't want to read the entire post, here is the gist. David Crowder chose to remove the original lyrics because he knew that they would be controversial and offensive to thousands of his listeners. Not wanting to lose the heart of the song's message, he changed his version. Now don't get me wrong, I'm not about to slam David Crowder. I am going to slam religious piety. What kind of world do we live in where so many Christians are offended by the thought of heaven meeting earth like a sloppy wet kiss? Are the choir robes squeezing off the blood supply to our hearts? (Do people even still wear choir robes?) Are we so holy and prudish that we are above a public display of affection towards our Savior? Let's unbutton the collar of our choir robes, breathe, and read a couple examples of sloppy wet kisses:

1. Weary from life and work, a man comes home and pats his knees, beckoning his ecstatic dog to his side. The dog wags his loyal tail ferociously, and with gusto, plants a big one on his owner's cheek. Bam! Unconditional love in the form of a sloppy wet kiss.

2. A toddler cautiously takes her first steps. She gurgles and coos as her parents gush over this grand achievement. Toppling through one last step, the toddler eagerly falls into her parents' arms, leans over and pops a sloppy wet kiss on her mother's cheek. This is affection at its finest...uninhibited. 

Free.

Hmm...Perhaps God is offended by all of this out of control affection. Let's kick it back a notch:

1. An owner comes home to his respectful dog, who carefully presses his nose to his owner's cheek.

2. A toddler takes her first steps towards her awaiting parents. After safely arriving in her parents' arms, she leans over, puckers up, and gently pecks her mom's cheek.

People, this has got to stop. This Jesus taming has got to stop. Do you know that his stomach growled when he was hungry? That he belly laughed as a kid? Do you know that he went fishing with a bunch of numbskulls and called them his buddies? He loved so hard and so much that when he'd sneak away for rest he couldn't resist reaching out to those who followed him. He provided wine at a wedding feast (and I am not talking about little plastic cups of Welch's).  He even allowed a prostitute to anoint him! He got really mad and he even cracked jokes.

Jesus, the very one present at Creation, invented sloppy wet kisses! Why do you think puppies and babies are so darn good at them?

Here is my challenge for you. Pray. Ask to see the real Jesus. The one who's eyes twinkle. The one who will literally sing to your heart. Do you know the first part of How He Loves?

"He is jealous for me."

He is so jealous for you that he literally laid his life down to bring you to his side. This is an intimate Savior, friends! This is not a dignified love. This is messy. It's gritty, risky, and desperately compassionate! This is the most beautiful love story of all Creation, and you are invited to the wedding feast...

as the bride!

If you truly listen for his voice, he will answer in the most specific way. It may even be with a kiss.

And who doesn't like to be kissed by their daddy?


"We do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are." (Hebrews 4:15)


As always,

Cheering you on & checking the fuel gauge,
Layla

P.S. If you are curious like me, here's a video telling the story behind How He Loves.

Part One: Religious Choke-Hold

Here I sit with so many things I want to put into words. Words that won't come. I don't know where to start, or how to end, I only know that if I don't speak I'll explode. Or maybe it's the opposite. Maybe something inside me has exploded and I need to heal. For me, writing is healing, so long as the words are gifted to the reader (or writer) in such a way, they leave behind trimmings of celebration. Streamers of love and banners of compassion. Gifts of grace and hugs so big they could wrap up any hurt or fear.

I need a full-on Grace Celebration.

This post has been coming for a while. At least a good year. Maybe three...or ten??? During this time, I've devoured books, clung to Scripture, and prayed for the clouds of uncertainty to part. I've looked religion in the face and cringed when I saw it had fangs. What I'd once found comfortable was devouring me heart first. Sure, I'd felt its hot breath on my neck before, but I'd keep convincing myself that the familiar was my comfort zone, no matter how dangerous it might look at times. Years and years of twisted "truth" had sprouted roots and grown thorny vines around my heart and mind. I simply couldn't see for all of the prickly foliage. It truly had very deep roots. It still does, but I'm fighting back the weeds, even pulling them with my teeth if necessary.

I'm sick of the choke-hold.


Why do I have the feeling that you are too?

Through every scrape and thorn, walking over a multitude of lying snakes and pesky bugs, tripping over my own blindness and stubborn will...

He still had his hand on me.

And He'd wept in that garden, too. 

He knew the thorns that would tear at my ankles and peel away the layers of my heart. He's breathed warnings and tried to show me the way out, but I kept going in circles, until I finally collapsed at His feet. I handed him the poisonous vial of religion and wretched from the bottom of my soul. Yes, Jesus was (is) my Savior, but I'd allowed an imposter to dictate my thoughts and deeds. I wasn't following the Gardener, I was following the snake.

Religion.

Please know this: It's not been all bad. As with all things in this fallen world, God can use anything or anyone to bring his sheep into the fold.

It's not been all bad.

Isn't it strange how evil things tend to dig fastest into Heart's soil, masking the light that good things need to grow? Yes, the seeds were planted, even growing, but growth was stunted due to lack of light. Without full view of the Light, this little plant was weak. Oh, so weak and weary. Every time I'd lean into the Gardener's touch, the Accuser would remind me of what a pathetic sapling I was.

As in Scripture, I would hear such lies: "When the Pharisee who had invited him saw this, he said to himself, "If this man were a prophet, he would know who is touching him and what kind of woman she is-that she is a sinner." (Luke 7:39)

She. Is. A. Sinner.

I'd cower in the shade of religious tangles, trying to make sense of it all. Nothing was adding up. Nothing seemed to fit. This Jesus of the Bible was not the Jesus I'd seen in Sunday School, or even church (most of my life). Yes...yes! I'd caught beautiful glimpses of him and I understood grace. But the shadows were casting gray hues over my eyes, and I felt heavy. Weak.

This did not add up!

 "Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.” (Matthew 11:28-30)


Light? If this was true, why did I feel as if the weight of the world, the religious world, was breaking my tiny branches? Why did I fear that the first wind which came along would toss me across the fields? Yet I knew Scripture to be Truth, because the Gardener was holding my roots firmly. His warm hand never left my head. He had covered me from the cold shade of the Accuser. That evil one who used the Gardener's words and twisted them into crowns of deceit. Thorny crowns. My Savior took that crown for me, and I will not have anything to do with lies that want to poison my heart!

Oh, Jesus, please lead me through this place! I can do anything as long as you are walking with me. I know you'll pull the thorns from my heart, and reveal the roses of your truth. Please continue to prune and trim away the lies.

One of the many, many books that have helped me along the way is Beautiful Outlaw by John Eldredge.  I will literally get on my knees and beg you to read this book, if that's what it takes. Especially if you are not a Christian, or if you are a burnt-out Believer. I'd buy a copy for every person I know, if I could. You'll need to take off your religion tinted glasses before reading it. If you do read it, will you let me know? Please? :) I'd love to hear your thoughts.


This is Part One of I don't know how many posts. There are many things I'd like to discuss, but none of it will make any sense if religious fog is choking out the view. I hope that you will come back. 

As always...

Cheering you on & checking the fuel gauge,
Layla

Pics, While I Gather Thought Bunnies (And Two Gluten Free Recipes)

I haven't posted lately, because I've been busy enjoying life. For the first time since February, I feel like I am actually getting well! It's soooooooo amazing! I've been cooking, cleaning, wearing non-PJ-type-clothing, swimming, teaching school, reading, and even putting away the laundry! 

People, hear me when I say this, "Never take feeling well for granted!!!" 

I know that sounds obvious, but so much life is missed during the blur of illness. You just forget. At least I do. I plan on enjoying this illness-free break for as long as it lasts. I even plan on walking in the mornings, as soon as it's not hot enough to fry bacon on the sidewalk.

YIPPEE!!!

I've had a million things running through my mind that I want to post about, but I think I need to unscramble the thought bunnies first. There are so many hopping around inside my head, that I can't squeeze them all into a nicely arranged basket. My plan is to sneak off to Panera as soon as I publish this post, have a smoothie, and find my way through the "clutter."

For now, I bring you pics from the past couple of weeks. If you follow me on Instagram, you've already seen most of these. (Sorry!) I'll conclude with two requested gluten free recipes.

 :) Here's what's been going on:

A tea towel that I embroidered for my mom's birthday.

My boys drew the designs.

Skyler's design:

Blayne's design:

Tate's design:

It's been hot.

HOT, people!!!

Possum was like, "It's SO hot!"

We ventured out for haircuts....finally!

Yep, I whacked it all off!

Then I spent the evening with my friend, Sunshine.
Pretty much love her to bits.

The next day,  Emily put this fancy little bonnet on my head...

...and I was blonde!

(Thank you, Emily!)

Skyler and Blayne have been spending a lot of time
making salsa with garden fresh veggies.

I posted some thoughts on Instagram:

Skyler found the world's coolest napkin holder.

So I bought it, because...I mean...who wouldn't???

Tate participated in the Yoga Olympics.

He won.
(Nobody else was able to compete, as our hands would have snapped off.)

The kids played Pac Man at the dentist office.
(No cavities!)

I baked. A lot.
So people asked for recipes.

Here are a couple of gluten free recipes:

Sticky Gooey Lemon Brownies
(Gluten free version.)

I cannot take the credit for this recipe, as I used this one and adapted it for our gluten free diet.

To make the above recipe gluten free: Substitute wheat flour for 1/2 cup millet flour, 1/2 cup rice flour (I buy my rice flour at the Asian market, because it is so finely ground.), and 1/2 cup sweet rice flour. Add 1 teaspoon of xatham gum to the flour blend and whisk together thoroughly. Now all you have to do is follow the recipe! These are unbelievably good.

Vegetable Lasagna With White Sauce

(Gluten free version.)

Once again, I cannot take credit for this recipe.

I did make several changes. I used these gluten free lasagna noodles. Instead of 2 tablespoons of butter, I used 1 stick (yes, one whole stick). I skipped the salt and added three eggs instead of two. I believe I used 15 lasagna noodles. Instead of wheat flour, I used rice flour (the kind I get from the Asian market). And I figured that 3/4 cup of Parmesan sounded better than 1/4, so I piled that on too. Other than that, just follow the recipe. ;) It's DELICIOUS!

Enjoy!

Cheering you on & checking the fuel gauge,

Layla